The Lishman Journal - Days 61 - 63

I wanted to write another journal entry today because I have newsworthy substance to impart.  

As you may have read in the previous journal entry, on Saturday I went walkies to the top of Denmark Hill and on Sunday I walked my gorgeous visitor to the hospital entrance and back.  This gave me the realization that I CAN DO THIS!  I CAN stop having seizures, I CAN walk again, I CAN be in a noisy, bustling, crowded space, I CAN talk normally, intelligibly and authoritatively.  Basically I CAN HAVE MY LIFE BACK.  With independence and options and enjoyment and love and companionship.  All those things I had long ago lost to illness and misinterpretations.    This really IS going to work!!!!!

So, in this heightened state of self-acknowledgment and awareness, Monday was “Ward round day” and I was able to decide, along with the team, on a discharge date!!!  And so it is to be that, on the 25^th March 2014, I shall be leaving here and returning to Hampshire, once again to take on this wonderful world of ours.  I wonder what will befall me upon my new pathway through life.  I am still unsure as to whether I shall be able to drive and I am finding this question to be increasingly important to me.  Upon this decision depends my future moves.  I am starting to allow myself the faint hope of being able to MOT my car, have it serviced, hook up my caravan and go a-roving for a couple of (few) months into the summer.  I have decided every other “procedure” I should re-organizing at the hospital I shall put on hold.  They are unimportant in the grand scheme of things (at least, until my arm drops off and the other bit I don’t use any more……..).

Leoni, now in her home stretch, has choices to make and we are all encouraging her in her efforts to push on through the pain and despondency, irritation and annoyances, bewilderment and past to achieve her goal.  I’d like to walk out of here to the main entrance with her beside me to see me off………….. (are you listening L????) XX.J

Today, being Shrove Tuesday, our resident cookery team came up trumps once again and out lunch was capped off beautifully and tastefully with pancakes and a choice of toppings – lemon and sugar or ham and cheese or chocolate spread………………..mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. THANKS PEOPLE!

We also had 2 newbies arrived, both ladies so it’s been a fairly hectic day all told.  Quite surprising how new arrivals can cause such a change in our “regime”, especially in the dining room with seating arrangements.  I must say we do NOT do well in changing “OUR” seating plan!! J

And so to close this evening, sitting in the dining room on a towel (stops me sweating against the chair seats….so much more comfortable now but won’t go into detail)J and awaiting supper……..can I cram any more in????

Until tomorrow dear friends………..sleep well and may tomorrow bring even better things to you all………. XX

The Lishman Journal - Days 46 - 60

Well, well, well……quite the couple of weeks just passed by.  Very eventful and quite a catharsis for me.  So what has happened?  Leoni managed to have a few seizures which Dave 2 then in his heightened empathy mirrored and repeated himself, only he broke his other wrist in the process……..we’ve had two Group FND psych sessions, I not only walked to physio during the week, took a stroll this morning ALL ON MY OWNSOME,

but also this afternoon "marched all the way to the top of the hill and marched back down again"…..(into Camberwell); I estimate about 1 mile all told.  An amazing achievement for one whom, just 8 weeks ago, was almost wheelchair bound.  Gaz and Linda were incredibly kind and took myself and Leoni (Linda’s daughter) to the Fox on the Hill for lunch……...and what a lunch!!!   Gammon steak, 2 fried eggs, mushroom, tomato and chips, all washed down with a glass of full-fat Pepsi! J  It is humbling to realize there are people such as these two who were in a car accident last Saturday (along with Leoni!) that wrote the car off, yet 6 days later drive all the way into London to visit and push TWO wheelchairs around Camberwell (yes, unfortunately although I made Camberwell walking, I then had to resort to the chair for a couple of seizures, a swoosh around Morrisons the supermarket and a push back to the hospital).

But I jump ahead.  Last weekend Leoni went home for a long weekend of planned revelry and debauchery (to say nothing of alcohol), however on the Saturday afternoon was unfortunately involved in a 4 car bumper-cruncher (fender-bender for our American cousins) which left all three of them very shaken and bruised, torn ligaments and whiplash and car-less!  So her Sunday 20^th Birthday was somewhat washed outL.  However, we here at the Lishman are not daunted and put on a “Lishman Birthday Bash” for her on Tuesday evening.  Dave 2 had baked a chocolate cake,  
Dave 1 had made an amazing Marvel 3D collage and the whole place had signed a card, some totally indecipherably, but done all the same.  So with a smile on her face she scoffed chocolate cake until the pain and stiffness was but a memory………….or was that the oromorph???J.

I had an unfortunate run-in with our DWP - Depratment of Works and Pensions (yes, I actually do mean dePRATment!!!) which put me into a foul mood and nearly 2 days of ongoing seizures but, as usual, I managed to bob to the surface again whilst thinking “well, if they want 3 years repaid it’ll just have to take the next 20 years”!! J.  It also brought me to the realization yet again that life is worth living for what I can DO and EXPERIENCE, not what money/possessions I have (or don’t have).

And so to Gardening Club on Wednesday with a few photos, but mostly the lovely fresh air, out in the garden with a few hardy souls and a wonderful feeling of nature renewing, plants growing whilst I too renew and regrow……….. I know, a bit schmaltzy, but a very strong truth in the analogy.

Thursday was my first ever outing to Camberwell, albeit in the capable hands of my lovely OT.  It certainly was a “baptism of fire”.  I had nearly reached the shops walking when one of our lovely local ambulances from Kings A&E drove toward us leisurely, but just as it reached us, switched on their siren!!!!  You can guess my reaction……………..immediate seizure!  Luckily as I toppled sideways I hit the fence beside me and managed to freeze onto it.  But succeeded in then carrying on and bought a couple of shirts to join the wonderful present from Laura Cordell!   We even managed a pot of camomile tea in the Love Street Café………….J.  The return chairbound journey ended similarly as another ambulance decided it’d be fun to watch me jump backwards in the chair…..ah well, I’m sure they didn’t really mean too………??????

Ah yes, just been reminded, Thursday 20^th was a memorable one (or would be if my memory worked)!  Three of us had Chinese YUMMY take-away (and full-fat coke)!  Spur of the moment decision and WELL worthwhile.  My tummy really appreciated the subtle taste and harmony….plus the chunks of pork and beef, prawn crackers, chicken balls, spring rolls.………………….! J

I suppose I should add here there was only three of us because everyone else in the “group” had buggered off home for the weekend!  Kinda why we decided to have one then to cheer ourselves up!

Now ever since Tuesday we have been playing a game of “hunt the parcel”.  The beautiful Margarita Baird Ulhaq tickled my interest by asking “had my little parcel arrived yet?”  No Margarita, nothing from north of the border, but Jeannie Maskery had sent me a great little package………..and a wonderful long read when I find myself with nothing to do during the rainy days and my concentration will allow.  So the hunt began, nurses et al. organised to search but to no avail until yesterday as I was passing the office I heard my name called and saw this huge box on a desk.  I was asked “is this the one?” and sure enough…………..bloomin’ great Amazon box in tartan (well, not really, but might as well have been).  So out came the scissors (from the locked box in the nurses’ room) and I open the box (after wrestling the scissors off the nurse who REALLY did not want me to have them!  (Honestly ma’am, I DO know how to use them safely!J), expecting to find a tiny package with loads of “chips”………..only to find ANOTHER box inside.  Even more curious, I opened this one and found????  Dozens of packs of Aberdeen Angus Steak flavoured CRISPS!!!!  HUH?  Then my mind immediately flipped back to a conversation we’d had a couple of weeks ago about my badly wanting a nice, juicy steak so Margarita, unable to send me an actual Angus cow (Royal Mail refuse to ship livestock apparently – who’da guessed?), sent me the next best thing!  A HUGE thank you to both Margarita and Jeannie for their amazing thoughtfulness and generosity!! XXXXX

And so the day ends with Leoni and I sat in the dining room, she waiting patiently for me to finish this lengthy journal entry so we can finish watching an hilarious YouTube video of a comedian (AlohaFluffy) and me with sunburn and a painful shoulder……………..oh yes, sorry, forgot to tell you I went sunbathing this afternoon out on a garden bench with cuppa in hand and 2 kneeling pads for a headrest…………ah bliss. J

See you all soon lovely FNDers.............. HUGZ XX

P.S. I’ve just been reminded, I also had peas for lunch………….. J